Why We'd Have Been Better Off as Monkeys

I saw a monkey today. I smirked and thought to myself: "To think we all came from THIS!" (Theists, don't worry. I'm sure God still loves you loads. He'll send down goodie packs very soon)

But then I was thinking. Life would have been so much easier if I had been a damn monkey.

They don't have to write exams. They don't have to deal with identities. They don't get married. Hell, they can sleep around with anyone they want to. There's no poor monkey and rich monkey. There are no monkeys that go to war in Iraq. Or Afghanistan. As far as I know, there are none that blow themselves up to prove a point.

There are no Monkeys that preach bullshit to others and has a huge following. There are no Monkey Gods. There are no Monkey temples. Monkeys don't have to listen to Pop Music. Or Britney Spears. Or Justin Whatever-that-Kid-is.

In Monkey life, everything is fair.

Yes, I know what you're going to say. You're going to say, if you like it so much, then why don't you go live in the damn forest. Why are you enjoying the 'comforts' of life and still complaining?

Well, if I didn't know there were any comforts, would I miss them?

They say that the greatest thing that happened in evolution, was the evolution of the human brain. A brain with ultimate capacity to do wonderful things.

And here we are, quite a few billion of us. Our lives are too complicated. Too pointless. And we've destroyed, or in the process of destroying, everything around us.

But it seems that the Universe will win again. There should always be a balance right. Calamities occur and ALWAYS balances out the equation if there ever is a surge.

Our own brain is our biggest calamity. So bring it on. Bring on the pollution, the nuclear bombs, the international disputes, borders, heavy artillery and more teen pop music.

We will be balanced soon.

PS: Sorry for this post. Just one of those days when you feel like this. I should be back to normal in about 24 hours.

(Image Courtesy: potstuck.com)


Anonymous said...


1.You still can sleep with anyone you want!

2.If you were a monkey, you would have to fight with the alpha to get the woman you want.

Otherwise, I kinda do agree, I wish I knew a life without religion (Bombs and wars would just disappear, wouldn't they?)

Ooh now I am trying not to imagine you with flaming red cheeks!

Sam said...

If only wishes were horses, or is it the other way around?

Paul Francis said...

you're perfectly normal in thinkin like this!!cuz it's true!!:)

B. said...

Hahha... LMAO

True. Monkeys don't hav to tweet. Or upload cool dp's.

Jr. said...

@ Rashi,
Ah well, I'd always be the Alpha Male wherever I went, if I were a monkey. So no worries. And what about my cheeks again?

@ Sam,
I'm not quite sure either.

@ Polly,
(sigh) Yes, it'd seem so.

@ B.
I KNOW! I'm considering upping disgusting pics just to piss off people. :D

Rajlakshmi said...

lolzzz there's nothing wronf being a monkey... most of us are already are... even after evolution :P

Jr. said...

Totally true. :P

Elma Bartholomew said...

i thk m fallin in luv wid ur words Jr :) i cnt stop imaginin a monkey blowin himelf up to prove a point!!

Jr. said...

He he he.. Thank you ji. :D

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